I'll Never Desert You: The Food & Dances

After Mr. C and I had our post-ceremony portraits taken, we were taken back to the house so that we could have a quick dinner in private and share our first moments alone together as husband and wife. The venue set up a small sweetheart table in the bridal suite and had our food waiting for us when we arrived. They made sure we had drinks and anything else that we needed! 

Like many brides before me, I could barely touch my food. What I did manage to eat was amazing though! Our venue is owned by an Atlanta/Athens catering company called A Divine Event. When we booked the venue, we knew that we were going to have amazing food, regardless of what we chose for the menu. After the wedding we had lots of guests gush about the delicious buffet-style dinner. We had cheeseburger sliders and buffalo chicken spring rolls as passed hors d'oeuvres during the cocktail hour. For dinner we had bistro beef with a merlot demi-glace and parmesan crusted chicken with artichokes, wild mushrooms, and a lemon cream sauce. Our sides included a mixed green salad with oranges, strawberries, and sweet and spicy pecans, macaroni and cheese with panko bread crumbs, and sauteed seasonal vegetables. These were some of the most economical options available through A Divine Event and everything was great! I can only imagine what it would have been like if we had extra room in the budget to splurge on the food.  

After dinner I snapped a few quick photos with my phone to preserve the memories. We were newlyweds at last!

Just married!

Another reason I barely touched my food was that I was incredibly anxious to get back downstairs and see our guests. It had already been over an hour since the ceremony and it was time for us to be introduced to our guests as husband and wife. I didn't change my last name, so I had my brother (the DJ) introduce us simply as newlyweds. Then it was time for our first dances. 

All photographs are by Christopher Helm Photography.

Mr. C and I did not sign up for dance lessons before the wedding. Not only did we forgo the dance lessons, but we never even set aside time to practice our first dance! I think somehow in all the insanity and hustle before the wedding, it was simply forgotten. We ended up swaying awkwardly for several minutes in front of our intensely attentive guests. We passed the time by joking and laughing, hence all the photos of us smiling. I love these photos and I don't regret not taking lessons or practicing. It worked for us -- but a warning to future brides: it can be awkward! 

We danced to Adele's cover of The Cure's "Lovesong." I think it's a really romantic and beautiful song, and I love the lyrics. I've always loved the original song by The Cure, but Adele definitely adds an extra element of romance with her beautiful, haunting voice. 

Whenever I'm alone with you

You make me feel like I am home again

Whenever I'm alone with you

You make me feel like I am whole again

Whenever I'm alone with you

You make me feel like I am young again

Whenever I'm alone with you

You make me feel like I am fun again

However far away, I will always love you

However long I stay, I will always love you

Whatever words I say, I will always love you

I will always love you

And then, the moment I was silently dreading: the father/daughter dance. Why was I dreading it? Because I knew I was going to cry my eyes out! I wrote about this months ago, about how I'm such a daddy's girl and I knew this was going to be a very emotional moment for me. I was cruel to my father and never told him which song I chose. It was "I Will" by The Beatles -- the song he used to sing me as a little girl. I still can't listen to this song without my eyes welling with tears.

As predicted, I cried the entire two minutes. Thankfully, it's a rather short song! I settled for covering my face with my bangs to avoid looking like a hot bawling mess in front of 80 guests.

Who knows how long I've loved you
You know I love you still
Will I wait a lonely lifetime
If you want me to, I will.

For if I ever saw you
I didn't catch your name
But it never really mattered
I will always feel the same.

Love you forever and forever
Love you with all my heart
Love you whenever we're together
Love you when we're apart.

And when at last I find you
Your song will fill the air
Sing it loud so I can hear you
Make it easy to be near you
For the things you do endear you to me
Oh, you know, I will
I will.

Luckily Mr. C and his mom were able to lighten the mood a little after the emotionally charged father/daughter dance. Mr. C's mother chose the song for the mother/son dance: Sarah McLachlan's "Ordinary Miracle." Their dance was a lot less emotional, more sweet and lighthearted. It also gave me a moment to finally sit down at our official sweetheart table (which was barely used throughout the night).

It's not that unusual
When everything is beautiful
It's just another ordinary miracle today

The sky knows when it's time to snow
Don't need to teach a seed to grow
It's just another ordinary miracle today

Life is like a gift they say
Wrapped up for you everyday
Open up and find a way
To give some of your own

Isn't it remarkable
Like every time a raindrop falls
It's just another ordinary miracle today

Birds in winter have their fling
Will always make it home by spring
It's just another ordinary miracle today

When you wake up everyday
Please don't throw your dreams away
Hold them close to your heart
'Cause we're all a part of the ordinary miracle

Do you want to see a miracle?
It seems so exceptional
The things just work out after all
It's just another ordinary miracle today

Sun comes up and shines so bright
And disappears again at night
It's just another ordinary miracle today

At this point I think our guests were eager for the dance floor to officially open. My brother, the epic DJ, set the night alight with some awesome music. Up next, the guests get down and the lovely speeches. 

Previously on The Camel Wedding Recaps: 

1) Getting Dressed & Exchanging Gifts

2) Putting on the White Dress

3) Our First Look

4) The Ceremony Begins

5) The Reading 

6) The Vows

7) The Kiss and Recessional 

8) The Bridal Party

9) Wedding Portraits

Getting Married at 30

I will be 30 years old when I get married. I realize that I'm considered an "older" bride, statistically speaking. According to US census data, most American women get married at around 25 or 26 years old. I'm also one of the "older" blogger Bees, although there have been a few 30-somethings here in the past (Mrs. Cauldron, Mrs. Mink, Mrs. Snapdragon, to name a few).

Recently, you may have read awesome entries from both Miss Bat and Miss Otter on getting married young. But this one is for the "older" brides and the "older" single or not-yet-engaged ladies. Yes, I see you not-yet-engaged ladies who are lurking around Wedding Bee! No shame! I was in your shoes one year ago.

I am one of the last of my friends to get married. When I scroll through the class of '01 on Facebook I see a lot of married people and I see a lot of babies. Some of my classmates and friends are now on their second or third child! And here I am, puttering around with just an engagement ring. No mortgage or car payment to speak of, chillin' on some furniture from Target and Ikea. Do I feel behind the times? No, I don't. The idea of having children still terrifies me. I have no idea where I want to buy a home and invest in a future. Luckily, Mr. Camel feels the same way. Mr. C, who will be 36 on our wedding day, has obviously seen his friends and relatives married off and having children for years now. He often tells me that after 30, he resigned himself to a life alone. He didn't think he would ever get married and certainly not to someone he could be 100% himself around. And then along came me. Now here we are, ready to take that first big step: marriage. Marriage at 30.

Even if I was given the opportunity, there is nothing I would change about my past. I feel that everything, both the good and the bad, has happened for a reason and happened at the right time for me. As much as I would have loved to know a younger Mr. C, to have have shared in those crazy, lazy days of high school and college together, I know that we met and fell in love at exactly the right time in our lives.

I consider myself to be fiercely independent. I experienced my 20's at full throttle. I biked across France alone when I was 20 years old. I traveled across Europe, explored the life of T.E. Lawrence in England, and spent two years teaching English in a tiny Japanese town of 4,000 people. Could I have done all of these things with the love of my life by my side? Absolutely! But for me, my 20's was about reaching out to life's experiences on my own. Meeting people, going places, and finding myself along the way. There were failed relationships. There were a few regrets here and there. But for me it was never about partying or casual dating.

Relationships are about compromise. As a 20-something I was able to live my life and make decisions based on what was best for me and me alone. I realize that sounds incredibly selfish, and it is. But it was also liberating and empowering. It enabled me to move to Japan, attend graduate school, teach English in Italy for a few weeks in a study abroad program, and find a job in a town where I wanted to live and work. Yes, you can do all of those things and more while married, but those plans and decisions can become much more problematic when two people are involved. I never had to plan my life or my decisions around the man in my life. I spent over two years living on my own, doing my own thing, growing comfortable with the silence of my own thoughts. In fact, that was the hardest thing to give up when Mr. C and I decided to move in together. We live in a small two bedroom apartment and every now and again I find myself pining for my tiny Japanese flat (even without central heating and air!) or the place I lived when I first started dating Mr. C. I miss the quiet. I miss that feeling of being utterly alone in your own space.

As a disclaimer, I haven't always felt so comfortable about getting married later in life.  I kept a blog in my early 20's and there are many entries where I sigh and wring my hands about being unable to share so many of life's moments with the person I love. Ten years ago, at the age of 20, I wrote a an entry entitled "To the Person I Haven't Met Yet." Here's how it ended: Youth fades so quickly, and I feel that time is running out. Every day without you seems a waste of energy and beauty. I don't have all day, and there's so much I have to tell you, and so much I want to show you. I have looked and looked, and I still can't find you. So you win. You can come out now.

Oh dear, sweet 20-year-old Miss Camel. You are so intense with all of your emotions swimming just under your papery skin. You will lead a life that the wide-eyed teenager you once were would be intensely proud of. And you do find that guy, and guess what? He wasn't in Rome or Tokyo or Manchester. He was next door. He was next door just waiting for you to finish your journey. He was there waiting to capture your wildly expanding heart. And when you meet him you will have so much to show him. Even now you aren't done sharing stories and there's no end to the places you want to take him. You will have a lot to talk about because your stories only got better. At 20, Miss Camel, you were barely out the door.

At 30, I am ready to take the next step with the man I love by my side. I'm ready to start a new journey, but it's not just me and my old shoes anymore. There will be lots of compromising and it won't always be easy. There will be times when I miss doing things on my own, but at the end of the day, having Mr. C in my life is absolutely worth it. Now we're an unstoppable team.

If you are in your late 20's or 30's and you still haven't met that special someone, don't get yourself down. Or maybe, like me, you are with someone who makes you feel doubtful or uncertain about your future together. You are waiting for the next step, but not sure that it's the right thing to do. Let it go. Enjoy your independence. Enjoy being utterly, completely yourself on your own. You have a whole life to meet someone and a whole marriage of compromising waiting for you. I realize that at this age many women feel their biological clocks ticking away, but watching the clock won't stop time. Get out there and live your life, do the things you enjoy doing, and know that somewhere along the way you will meet the right person. And when you do, think of all the amazing stories you will have to share.


We shall never cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time

Excerpt from "The Wasteland" by T.S. Eliot

Honoring the Past (Without Pissing Everyone Off)

About ten years ago I attended my cousin's wedding. It was a very high class Southern affair with a big outdoor tent and a delicious buffet of traditional Southern delights. Even years later I still I remember that they displayed framed photos of both the bride and the groom's parents on their wedding days. I remember thinking what a sweet gesture it was, and how I would never be able to do the same thing at my own wedding.

My parents were divorced when I was 13 years old. It was mess and even 16 years later there are still a lot of old wounds and scars on both sides of the family. In fact, I am really dreading the potential drama which now looms ominously on the horizon as our wedding approaches, namely the fact that my mother has never met (nor has any desire to meet) my stepmother.  Mr. C's parents are also divorced and his parents currently coexist in an emotional stalemate. It's trouble on both sides. Trouble to the point that we are reserving room blocks at two different hotels in order to preserve the peace. But more on that later.

My mom and dad on their wedding day. I love my mom's lace dress and I love the fact my dad is very obviously checking her out!

But here's the thing -- I wish there was some way that we could honor both of our parents' first marriages, seeing as we (Mr. C and I) were the results of those unions, even if they didn't end with "happily ever after." I wish we could display the photos without opening old wounds or creating awkwardness (there will be plenty of that anyway, to be sure). This is definitely something we would have to consult our parents on beforehand to see how they feel about the issue. But something tells me it probably isn't going to be possible, which makes me sad.

One thing is for sure though -- we will definitely be displaying photographs of our grandparents' weddings and photos of the loved ones who have passed on. At least those are two things we can display without any complicated emotions.

My grandparents on their wedding day. It was a classic WWII story where my grandmother married him at the courthouse before he left with the Navy.

What do you think? Would it be poor taste to display a photograph of our parents' first weddings? Should we include only photos of their second marriages or perhaps no photos at all? Have you, or someone you know, handled this situation your own wedding?

Hello Hello!!

Hey guys! I'm Miss Camel and I'm so excited to be introducing myself to you today! I feel incredibly honored to be able to share my wedding plans with such an awesome and welcoming online community. Not to mention that it's a great feeling to finally be able to give back to a group that has given me so much over the past several months. So come along -- join me on my (mis)adventures in wedding planning!

But first, a little about myself and the Mr. . .

This May I'll be marrying this super sweet, super dorky guy I met at work. We're planning a wedding with a theme that can only be described as Marie Antoinette at the Petit Trianon. If you've seen Sofia Coppola's beautiful film Marie Antoinette or visited the palace of Versailles then you will surely understand the look and feel that we are trying to accomplish. If not, stay tuned for more details and lots of images that have inspired me over the last few months.

Dressed up for my friend's wedding in Baltimore. (personal photo)

I'm a Georgia girl who doesn't define herself as truly Southern. Maybe that has something to do with my mom being from upstate New York, or the fact my dad now lives in LA, or maybe it's because I've never cared for grits, sweet tea, or collard greens. In my mind sweet tea = humming bird food -- it's way too sweet! I've lived in the South for essentially my entire life while never really identifying with Southern culture or the Southern lifestyle. Let's put it this way, I have never used the word "ya'll" in a serious conversation. But get me angry and you'll hear a hint of my Southern accent.

I love living in the South -- the hot, humid summers alive with the sounds of cicadas, the golden tinge of light in a hay field at sunset, the sagging remains of abandoned barns dotting the edge of highways. Summer weather arrives in April and stays until October. I've never known the pain of shoveling snow from the driveway or keeping a thick, woolen blanket in the back of my car in case of an inopportune breakdown. And what about Southern hospitality? It certainly can't be beat.

All this talk about the South and here I am marrying a guy from Michigan. Not only that but I traveled around the world only to meet the love of my life in the classroom next door to mine. But we met, and crushes blossomed, a relationship formed, an apartment was shared, and now we are engaged to be married!

I am so happy that my invitation to join the Hive coincided with a seriously adorable generation of icons: the endangered species generation. Everyone seemed partial to the otter or the adorable black squirrel (definitely a close second for me), but I just knew I had to have the camel. It might have something to do with my weird obsession with Lawrence of Arabia. Okay, it has everything to do with my weird obsession with Lawrence of Arabia. And I'm not just talking about the 1963 David Lean film starring the handsome Peter O'Toole. . .

Peter O'Toole taking a break during the filming of David Lean's Lawrence of Arabia. (source)

. . . I'm talking the real historical figure, T.E. Lawrence. I teach social studies for a living so I think I'm allowed a few quirks. (There's actually a lot of quirks. I think I have met my lifetime quirk quota.) I asked my fiance how he felt about me choosing the camel, seeing as he will be known henceforth as "Mr. Camel." He gave me a huge, beaming smile and said he would be incredibly proud to be known as Mr. Camel. I can't tell you how much I love this guy!

The REAL Lawrence of Arabia: T.E. Lawrence. All images circa 1918-1918 and found at Clio History

Mr. C and I have many common interests and hobbies and yet very different personalities. I think this is the secret to our successful and easy-going relationship. Our differences really complement each other and we make a great team, both in our professional lives and our personal lives. I'm a very direct, no-nonsense type of person with introverted tendencies and a lack of social graces. Mr. Camel however is honestly one of the kindest, most genuine and compassionate people I've ever known. He is loved by everyone he meets because he is an optimistic person who always does his best. As a team I say what needs to be said and he smooths it over with his charm. When I'm down, he does everything he can to cheer me up. When I have a crazy idea, his eyes sparkle with a shared enthusiasm. He always knows what to say when I get myself into a rut, something that is especially important considering our challenging work environment.

We also may be huge dorks. Here we are at Dragon*Con.

We both teach social studies at a rather challenging high poverty Title I high school. When we're not teaching, tutoring, or lesson planning (we do a lot of all three) we are hanging out at home with our two cats, playing video games (like Skyrim, StarCraft or Minecraft), spending time with our friends, visiting family, or seeing the world.

We also may or may not procrastinate by taking weird photos of our cats Loken and Jasper.

We have family in Illinois, Michigan, and California so keeping up with everyone definitely keeps us busy, especially around the holidays. We know the value of a relaxing Saturday at home, or maybe a not-so-relaxing weekend spent scouring the local thrift stores and flea markets for milk glass. But that's a story for another time.

Until then, please know how excited I am to share our story and our wedding with you!